from what i’ve observed self-flagellation is just another way to put yourself at the center of the universe and close yourself off from the things that make you feel vulnerable
I’m just thinking about this because I have a friend who is being encouraged to put himself down (by a poisonous little turd whose neck i would gleefully ring like a fucking dinner bell given the chance) and the effect it seems to have is that he scoffs at his own problems for not being “real problems” and god damn I hate that shit a lot.
It’s actually really dangerous to devalue your own suffering because the more you do that the less able you become to deal with what’s hurting you. And when you suppress and devalue your own suffering for long enough it eats away at you behind the scenes, making it increasingly more likely you develop actively harmful coping mechanisms which not only harm you, but harm the people around you too. This is one of the big contributors to people developing abusive habits!
So please, I know it’s hard not to, I know that it’s not as easy as knowing it’s bad to make it stop, but please remember that your own problems aren’t worthless, that your wellbeing should not be an afterthought, and know that to truly care about other people means trying to take care of yourself well enough that you can express your love without harming people in the process.
Self-care is a social good. Self-care is ending cycles of abuse.
“You might look at his (Paulo Ferreira) situation from an outsider’s perspective and think ’well this is a player who used to be very good but maybe he’s not at the level the team needs him to be in order to be starting all the time.’ But then you look at him closely and you notice that he goes to training every day with child-like excitement and is as talented and up for it as everyone else. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. What is happening here? Who is this player and why does he never play? He’s the perfect professional, the kind of professional I strive to be, the example, but he’s also not preachy in any way or excessively moralizing. He’s the kind of person that can turn your whole world upside down with just a couple of words. I’d never met anyone quite like him.” - Fernando Torres
“I kept saying to him, ’Fernando, you’re doing well, just keep on working. This is a difficult moment, but you have to find a way to turn it around. Don’t give up. Continue working and know that while yes, you’re on this side today, it can be the complete opposite tomorrow. Tomorrow you might be out there playing again like you used to.’” - Paulo Ferreira
“I ended up taking him as an example, as an ideal to strive towards. He made me believe again that rewards do exist and are the result of great amounts of effort and patience.” - Fernando Torres (x)
Just some life experiences I felt like sharing.
It’s just one of those there’s-a-mood-for-it-let’s-do-it kind of post
go ahead and read it but don’t take it too seriously, because there are a lot of things that I haven’t thought through about; and I am not gonna necessarily going to make a point about anything.
There are many tutorials out in the wild that attempt to address the Photoshop “Save for Web” colour shift problem that many artists and web designers run into. However, a disproportionate number of these do so with half-baked workarounds that only “fix” the problem on content creator computers, while exacerbating the issue for their audience.
In this tutorial, I try to demonstrate how colour profiles affect image appearance on different browser types, and how best to make content look as good as it can on as many displays as possible from Photoshop. Don’t expect a comprehensive writeup about colour management - there are more authoritative treatises you can check out for that (start here: http://www.gballard.net/psd.html)
While I don’t proclaim to be an expert, I feel that I have done enough research and my own experiments to make the assessments I do on this tutorial. Regardless, I welcome any corrections from those of you who are more knowledgeable in the subject.
If you’ve ever had cause to throw furniture through windows because that painting you just spent a chunk of your life on looks all wrong when viewed on every other monitor display or browser, this might help.
Color profiles are a black art even among digital artists, it seems, but this is the most comprehensive thing I’ve seen explaining why colors shift and what to do about it.
1. There will be several days that you daydream about stepping in front of a city bus. Don’t. It will not be beautiful. It will not be brave. It will be selfish. It will be broken. Your mother will cry.
2. Don’t write for him. Write for you. Write for others like you. Write so the girl that thinks about stepping in front of public transportation doesn’t. Don’t be selfish.
3. When you will yourself to sleep and it doesn’t come- get up. It doesn’t matter that it’s 3 am. There will be other 3 am’s. Take a shower. Take two. Wash him out of your hair. Write a poem. Read the same book you’ve read 202 times again. The 203rd time might tell you something different. Don’t stay in bed- you will think about the bus again.
4. Don’t kiss him because he’s broken. Don’t kiss him because his laughter never reaches his eyes. Don’t try and fix him. Fix yourself first. Be selfish. He can’t save you.
5. Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don’t share your popcorn at the movies with anyone. Stroll around an art museum alone. Fall in love with canvases. Fall in love with yourself.
6. Dress up and wear red lipstick and get drunk with your friends. They’re the ones that will pick you up. Don’t kiss him. Or him. Don’t fall asleep on strange couches with strange boys. When his hand slides up your dress walk away. Hit him. Don’t kiss him. He can’t save you.
7. Get another tattoo. Get five more. Get another hole in your ear. Don’t listen to your dad. You will still be able to get a job. Did you really want to be employed by someone like your father? Haven’t you had enough of judgmental old white men anyway? Get fuck you tattooed in tiny letters on your hip.
8. When you feel the yearning for a new city- start over. Take 200 bucks and a three suitcases. Work anywhere that will have you. Meet strange people and forget your name. Call yourself Ruby. No one will know the difference. Remember to call your mother. Don’t be selfish. Come home when you find yourself in the strangers and the small one bedroom apartment.
9. Don’t whisper evil things into your own ear. Other people are going to shout them at you. Be your own hero. Keep a sword on your key ring.
10. Don’t step in front of a city bus. It will not be beautiful. Live. Stay up all night with a boy that promises you everything and means it. Live. See shitty local bands with a friend. Wear a different band’s t-shirt. No one will care. Live. Have a baby girl with tiny fingers and tiny toes someday. Pour love into her until it’s overflowing. Live. Wake up. Staying in bed all day is not poetic.
Do you hear that? It’s me. It’s your life. Wake up.
Next time someone tells you to eat more veggies, get down on of these tiny motherfuckers. These low fat, high fiber sons of bitches are healthy as shit without sacrificing flavor. Trying to eat better? START WITH A FUCKING BURGER.
SMOKEY BEAN AND SPINACH SLIDERS
2 cups chopped fresh spinach
1 cup chopped onion
3 cups cooked kidney beans or 2-15 ounce can
1/2 cup cooked brown rice (use leftovers)
4 cloves of garlic, chopped all small and shit
1 tablespoon liquid smoke (like I said, it is near the BBQ sauce at the store I swear. You haven’t even looked yet so stop complaining. It is there)
2 teaspoon soy sauce or tamari
1 tablespoon smoked paprika
2 teaspoons oregano
1 ½ teaspoons ground cumin
black pepper to taste
1/2 cup whole wheat breadcrumbs (any breadcrumbs you have are fine. Got nothing? Just toast up some bread until it is almost burnt looking and real dry then grate them shits or put them in a food processor to get some tiny fucking crumbs. They help soak up all the liquid so don’t leave this shit out)
Warm the oven to 375 degrees and lightly grease a large baking sheet. You can throw down some foil and then grease it if you are a lazy fuck like me and hate doing dishes.
Add the spinach and onion to a food processor and pulse until they are in tiny-ass pieces. Add the kidney beans, rice, garlic, liquid smoke, soy sauce, and seasonings and pulse until everything is all mixed up. It’s fine if a few larger pieces of the beans hang around but you want this looking like kinda paste-like. Place the bean-spinach mixture into a medium bowl and add in the fucking breadcrumbs. This should be slightly sticky and hold nicely when you form it into a ball. If it is too wet, add more breadcrumbs. Taste it and add more spices and whatever until it tastes good to you. Can’t do that shit with ground beef.
No food processor? It’s all good. Just cut up the spinach and the onion extra tiny and add everything but breadcrumbs to a big bowl. Now pound on that shit until it looks like chunky mash potatoes. Then add the breadcrumbs and do all the other shit I say above.
Divide the mixture into 16 patties if you are making sliders or 8 patties if you are making regular burgers. Whateverthefuck you want to do. Place them on the baking sheet, spray them lightly with oil (slow your roll, I said LIGHTLY) and bake for 15 minutes or until the bottom is a crispy golden brown. Flip the patties and bake for 15 or until both sides look awesome. If you are doing full size burgers you might need to let the sides go 5 extra minutes. Let them cool for a few minutes before serving. Pile them high with red onion, avocado, whatever additional deliciousness you’ve got and chow the fuck down.
Makes 16 sliders or 8 regular patties
“…a series of free online tutorials guiding you through the basics of sewing, from setting up your machine, to understanding sewing patterns, and finishing your seams.”
Saving this for later cause I’m getting rusty as a muggerbugger
reblogging because i need to learn and my mom has a sewing machine exactly like this one
More FREE online courses to take, & ways to earn your degree, without leaving your own home!!
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Reblogged for later
Wait is this for real? Hmmmm
Random fact of the day
“Blood is thicker than water”, when used in the context of family over friends, is in fact a wildly incorrect bastardisation.
The true, full quote is “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb,” and refers to relationships forged by choice holding deeper meaning than those of mere biology.